Self appointed General once reported that a minor breeze in Lawnland was “a full-scale invasion by air-based insurgents.” Demands Lawnland form a navy, despite the nation having no body of water. Claims to have “seen combat” but later admitted it was just a particularly aggressive game of Monopoly.
Zombie projects will leave the electricity grid queue after years of shuffling forward and asking whether anyone has a spare connection point.
Political peerages have rewarded another selection of public service careers with a permanent seat and excellent access to polished wood.
FCA leadership will support growth, manage risk and move further and faster without allowing the steering wheel to become ideological.
Medical gloves are reminded that hand hygiene still exists, despite a national belief in the spiritual powers of blue rubber.
Shropshire bus timetable arrives perfectly on time, unlike buses, and gives passengers a precise new way to be disappointed.
The UN puts Sustainable Development Goal 16 on April's calendar and hopes peace, justice and strong institutions can attend.
The Tom Cruise BFI Fellowship honours a huge film career, while Britain attempts the dangerous art of giving the action star an award at rest.
