Self appointed General once reported that a minor breeze in Lawnland was “a full-scale invasion by air-based insurgents.” Demands Lawnland form a navy, despite the nation having no body of water. Claims to have “seen combat” but later admitted it was just a particularly aggressive game of Monopoly.
A UKHSA study found strong protection against infant RSV hospitalisation after maternal vaccination, leaving the data chart dangerously pleased with itself.
New measures aim to widen healthcare careers for young people from deprived areas, while the stethoscope discovers unpaid administrative labour.
New voluntary sovereign debt crisis tools aim to make negotiations faster, clearer and more predictable, leaving panic to consult its creditors.
The Government’s £500 million Sovereign AI programme makes its first investment, prompting one server rack to claim national importance.
New Government guidance sets out how families, schools and early years providers can help children prepare for starting Reception.
An industrial electricity scheme consultation meets a fictional meter with executive ambitions.
UK clinical trial setup times reportedly fell to 122 days, leaving bureaucracy to celebrate a target as though it had invented medicine.
Councils face stricter conditions on pothole funding, while the tarmac awaits its performance review.
Nineteen Technical Excellence Colleges receive £175 million for skills training, while a robot arm confronts Britain’s most advanced system: administration.
Bus franchising funding gives six mayoral authorities £3 million to prepare, while the route map applies for management.
