The Ministry of Perception will introduce a new Sexuality Credit Rating for immigration and asylum applicants. It will assess not somebody’s actual sexuality, but the likelihood of another country getting the wrong idea.
The perception score
Under the new system, applicants will receive a score between 0 and 999. Officials will calculate it using public advocacy, social media activity, known associations, personal presentation and something called Overseas Perception Exposure.
Scores above 750 will be rated Strongly Perceived. Applicants below 500 may need to provide extra evidence that people in their home country could reasonably reach conclusions about them without possessing all the facts.
The Ministry of Perception said the system would replace the current “outdated reliance on what people actually are”.
“An applicant may have an excellent underlying sexuality but a very weak perception history,” an official explained. “Equally, somebody with no qualifying sexuality whatsoever may present an exceptionally strong international perception profile.”
Ratings will also vary by country. An applicant could hold a score of 318 domestically but rise to 846 after entering a jurisdiction with sufficiently aggressive assumptions.
Officials warned applicants not to improve their rating artificially. Changing clothes, attending events or suddenly following musical theatre accounts may trigger an Enhanced Perception Check.
Those unhappy with their score will be able to appeal to the Independent Orientation Reference Agency. It can upgrade applicants to Potentially Misunderstood, Widely Assumed or, in exceptional cases, Investment Grade Gay.
A premium tier may follow. It will let officials lose paperwork at a speed appropriate to the applicant’s score and call this a personalised service.
The Ministry said the reform would finally bring immigration policy into line with modern financial services. Important decisions there have long been made using a mysterious number nobody fully understands.
