Bank Rate held at 4.5% after an eight to one Monetary Policy Committee vote, leaving one quarter point outside the Bank of England with a clipboard, a visitor pass and the expression of someone who has discovered that democracy has an appointment system.
The decision followed the MPC meeting ending on 19 March, when eight members voted to maintain Bank Rate and one preferred a reduction to 4.25%. The Bank described its approach as gradual, careful, medium term and forward looking, which is the monetary policy equivalent of putting a simple answer in a folder marked “For further consideration” and locking the folder in a cupboard.
At the Directorate of Measured Frowning, rate custodian Prudence Coupon welcomed the outcome. “Inflation policy needs care,” she said. “We have therefore placed the biscuits under observation and will consider releasing them once the minutes have demonstrated sufficient seriousness.” The biscuits have reportedly appealed, but their appeal is being assessed against a range of snacks.
The Bank noted progress on disinflation while keeping policy restrictive. Inflation was expected to rise further in the near term before falling back, giving the forecast the emotional stability of a weather presenter standing between sunshine and a sinkhole. Weak growth, uncertain employment intentions and global trade uncertainty were also invited into the room, where they were given chairs but no useful answers.
Chief Economic Stationer Lionel Margin said the committee had avoided a sudden move. “Instead, we have made a sentence with several commas,” he said, before attaching three footnotes and asking whether the quarter point had completed the correct form. It had not. It had written “reduce” in the wrong box and is now being treated as a risk to institutional calm.
The dissenting cut has entered the familiar administrative journey from proposal to historical curiosity. It has been issued a lukewarm coffee, a numbered ticket and a reminder that the next meeting will consider everything carefully, including whether it is prepared to reconsider considering it. Eight members will maintain the rate. One member will maintain the hope that a decision can occasionally be shorter than its explanation.
By the time the biscuits receive guidance, the lonely quarter point will have collected enough waiting room stamps to qualify as a central bank, complete with a policy framework and absolutely no permission to use it.
Real story: Bank of England.
