Companies House appoints royalty by open competition
Companies House has appointed Andy King as its next chief executive. The corporate register completed an extensive search and discovered that nominative destiny had filed the correct paperwork.
King takes up the role in September and will lead 1,900 staff handling more than 14 million filings each year. Buckingham Palace was not involved, though somebody will undoubtedly ask whether the distinction needs a confirmation statement.
The appointment followed an open competition. Other imaginary finalists included Donna Director, Colin Compliance and a shell company called Definitely Not Three Ferrets Ltd.
The corporate register prepares a very small coronation
“Mr King met every criterion,” said Fenella Beneficial Owner, Keeper of Ceremonial PDFs. “He showed leadership, regulatory experience and a complete lack of interest in a gold coach at the Cardiff office.”
The role covers modernisation and corporate transparency. The official orb will therefore contain login credentials and remain safely inside a locked filing cabinet.
Staff may say good morning Andy. They should not kneel, sound a trumpet or list the office kettle as a Crown asset, however tempting that becomes during an audit.
Companies will keep filing accounts as normal. Anyone late may still approach the register, bow once and explain cash flow in the medieval language of their choice.
The incoming chief executive will take on a system central to the nation’s company records. A crown shaped date stamp has asked to remain available for ceremonial purposes only.
The bunting fails the filing check
Companies House has not announced a coronation. Nevertheless, the bunting has already been rejected because nobody submitted form CRWN01.
Read the real story: The official announcement of Andy King’s appointment.
